Coming Out

Author: Emma Grant
Rating: NC-17
Summary: Lots of things come out at a birthday party for Siri.
Warnings: non-con, het sex
Disclaimer: I don't own any of this. Just playing!
Feedback: Of course.

Note: Muchas gracias a Helens y Jedi Rita for the betas, the support, and the lengthy conversations about this wonderful universe -- y'all kick ass!

(Qui)

I don't know what I'm doing here. I didn't intend to come, but here I am
anyway, sitting on a bar stool, watching as every senior padawan currently on
Coruscant is dancing, drinking, writhing, and generally debauching himself,
herself, itself... Some genders just don't fit into categories. The music
is loud, the drinks are strong, and I really feel out of place tonight.

Obi-Wan convinced me to come. "It's Siri's Coming Out," he said. "We're
giving her the party of the year. You simply cannot miss it." I resisted.
He pleaded. I still resisted. He reminded me of how much fun I'd had at
his Coming Out two years earlier. I reminded him I got so drunk that night
I hardly remember it.

That's not quite true. I do remember much of that night, and I
particularly remember how he looked at me as the party drew to a close, when
many of his friends were finally staggering home. He'd leaned against the
wall and just stared at me, playing idly with his braid, inviting me, daring
me to take him up on his unspoken offer, despite the fact that I'd ended our
affair months earlier. Parts of my memory after that are spotty, but I do
remember how I kissed him and pressed him into the wall. And how he--

"Qui-Gon, you made it!" T'nell's voice is in my ear, shouting over the
blaring dance music, pulling me back into the moment. He slings a long arm
around my neck and kisses me sloppily. He's pleasantly buzzed, though not
from alcohol, as far as I can tell.

I smile at him. "Having a good time?" He nods vigorously. "Had a go at the
birthday girl yet?"

He laughs. "Actually, yes. And now I have nothing left to look forward to
tonight, do I?" He slides a little closer, smiling slyly, eyes sparkling.
It's clearly an invitation, and one I'm suddenly considering, much to my
surprise. I haven't thought about him much since that night, months ago,
with Obi-Wan. He's one of Obi's clubbing buddies and occasional lovers, so I
suppose I've been hesitant to pursue any sort of relationship with T'nell.
My apprentice tends to be a bit possessive with his friends.

Obi-Wan hasn't exactly been paying much attention to me lately, and at the
moment I'm finding this attention from T'nell quite intriguing. I smile a
little wider at him and pull him close, kissing him tentatively. He melts in
my arms, his mouth surrendering to mine instantly, arms snaked around my
back. He kisses like Obi, now that I think about it. He doesn't feel the
same in my arms, but still...

As if on cue, a third body is pressed against my side, arms twined around us
both. "Hello, boys," that familiar voice purrs softly. "Weren't you going
to wait for me?"

T'nell kisses my padawan on the cheek in greeting, saying, "I told you he'd
come. You owe me a drink." Obi-Wan smirks at T'nell before turning his gaze
to me. After the last week, it's a little strange to be subject to that
intense stare, usually reserved for the next person he plans to fuck. That
couldn't possibly be me, not after the way he's--

"I'm glad you're here, Qui." He insinuates himself between T'nell and me,
wrapping his arms around my neck, pulling my face close to his. "You
wouldn't have wanted to miss this." His lips brush mine teasingly, twice,
before I capture his mouth at last. I'm surprised at how good it feels to
kiss him, how much I've missed him. He's clearly intoxicated, but I don't
want to think that is why he's here now, in my arms. My lips part at his
insistence, and his tongue snakes into my mouth.

"Hey!" I pull away quickly, spitting a small pink pill into my hand. I push
him back into T'nell's arms, a little harder than I intended. "I don't take
these -- you know that."

He shrugs, his expression suddenly blank. "Fine." He stares at me for a
moment. The ice princess is back, apparently. I've been trying for over a
week to learn what has him so on edge. He won't talk to me.

"T'nell, come dance with me." He pulls the other padawan away, holding my
gaze coolly for a few more seconds before turning his back to me.

What the...?

To say that I am shocked by his behavior would not come close to describing
my emotions at this moment. He's never tried to force any sort of drug on
me before, and I can't understand why he would do so now, tonight. And to
drag T'nell away from me, when it was obvious that he and I were...

Could that be it? Could he be jealous? His possessiveness has always been
expressed through teasing before, not outright hostility.

I pick up my neglected drink once again, swirling it in inspection before
taking another sip. The song changes, and people rush to the dance floor.
The room itself seems to pulse with the beat.

I haven't been to a Coming Out since Obi-Wan's, more than two years ago. It
was in a smaller, quieter club than this, and there weren't so many people
there as are here tonight. His friends kept it private as well -- Jedi only.
Coming Out is a fairly old tradition -- at least a few hundred years old.
At one time, it actually did mark a padawan's transition to adulthood, but
now it's essentially an excuse for a wild party.

T'nell, Obi, and Bant planned this party for Siri on a much larger scale than
any I've experienced before. They reserved this club and let word of the
event spread through the trendy young crowd that frequents such
establishments. Jedi Coming Out parties are notorious, and wealthy
club-hopping Coruscanti youth have come to consider them social events not to
be missed.

As a result the crowd tonight is large, young, edgy, full of energy, and full
of the Force. They're also full of a variety of legal and illegal sustances.
I don't approve that Obi-Wan dabbles in such things, but he does so rarely,
and only when surrounded by friends he trusts.

He's dancing with T'nell and another boy I don't recognize. He's having fun,
I remind myself, perhaps releasing some of that carefully guarded tension
that's been shrouding his Force aura for weeks. Coming Out is supposed to be
a bit of a free-for-all, where the rules are relaxed and people enjoy
themselves and each other. That's probably why he tried to give me the Chaq
-- maybe he thought I'd be open to trying something like that tonight. Or
maybe he had something else in mind.

I think I'm getting a little old for this. I scan the room, and realize with
increasing distress that I'm very likely the oldest person here. I lean back
against the bar with a sigh -- I'm a fucking chaperone at a padawan party.
I should get the hell out of here and go do something else. Find someone
closer to my own age to fuck, maybe.

I signal the bartender to bring me another drink. Fortification first, then
I'll sneak away. There's someone I've been meaning to pay a visit to anyway.


My arms are quite suddenly full of a young, scantily-clad woman, who presses
her mouth to mine, hard -- oh, Force... tongue... that's... enough,
that's... kind of nice, actually... I start to kiss her back. She moans
and pulls away just enough that I can finally see her face. I blink,
genuinely surprised.

"Siri?"

"Hello, Master Jinn," she purrs, all smiles and sparkles and blonde hair and
lipstick -- I've never seen Siri wearing any sort of cosmetics before, and
I've certainly never seen her like this.

What she's wearing -- or perhaps not wearing -- drives memories of a
stubborn little girl in drab Jedi robes out of my mind. A very short, tight
black leather skirt is cut low on her hips, so low that the silver thong
she's wearing peeks out of the waistband, leaving a good thumb-width of
golden skin between the black leather and the silver straps tracing the width
of her hips. She stretches up a little, clearly enjoying the attention --
this is her night, after all. Even more of that silver fabric emerges from
her skirt. It's more like she's sewn herself into a strip of black leather,
really. Other than that, she's wearing a silver top, the purpose of which
must only be to cover her breasts. It barely does that, and covers little
else. Most of what I see when I look at her sleek, athletic body is skin --
golden, shimmering skin. Her navel is pierced, and I immediately wonder if
Adi approves. I wonder if Adi knows that her padawan looks like this
tonight?

Siri has been watching my eyes travel up her body and she takes a step back,
posing for me now, long golden legs apart, thumbs hooked into the waist of
the leather skirt, hip cocked to one side. Her chin is tilted down just
slightly and she looks up at me through thick dark lashes. Her eyes are
lined with a dark color, and her lips are shockingly red. Her long blonde
hair is pulled back from her face by a wide black leather strap, and it falls
loosely around her shoulders. Her lips part slightly, and the tip of her
tongue snakes out to wet the lower one. One hand darts up to playfully
finger the strand of barrier packets around her neck.

That is a tradition much older than me as well. The person Coming Out
wears a necklace made of a number of barrier packets threaded on a leather
strap -- typically 18, or whatever number constitutes the age of majority for
the individual's species. Tradition holds that the wearer must personally
use all of the packets during the course of the night. I think I managed to
get through eight myself, and I could barely walk the next day. Siri looks
like she's about halfway through her supply already. She fingers one of the
packets while watching my face.

How much time has passed? I think I've been staring at her for several
minutes. I meet her gaze at last and almost blush at the smile that caresses
her lovely face. I suddenly feel a bit perverted, leering at this girl -- a
girl, who's only legal as of today, I remind myself. I take a controlled
breath.

"Siri, you... you've grown up. Quite nicely, I might add."

She smiles wide and slinks forward, sliding her arms around my neck and
pressing herself between my knees. Her mouth is inches from mine, and her
breath is warm on my chin, smelling of wine. Her lips brush mine as she
presses her pelvis into my groin.

"Master Jinn," she whispers between feathery kisses, "I've fantasized about
you for years. I've always thought you were one of the sexiest masters in
the Order." She kisses me teasingly, lips tugging at mine, tongue darting
into my mouth slightly before pulling away again. "Obi-Wan and I used to lie
awake at night and talk about you during sleepovers. He would tell me what
you looked like naked." She kisses me again.

This is... well, very strange, I must admit. One isn't normally
propositioned so directly by padawans, and I have to remind myself yet again
that this is part of Coming Out -- rank and relationships are generally
ignored by all. I'm becoming very aroused by all of this, despite the fact
that I typically prefer women who are a little more mature. I seem to have a
weakness for young men, but most of my female lovers have been older than me.
Now that I think about it, I realize I haven't been with a woman in years.
In fact, Adi may have been the last one.

Oh, don't think about that now, not when her padawan is here, pressing
herself between my legs, kissing me...

She pulls away again and grins. "I always thought you'd be a great kisser.
I was right."

"I'm good at other things as well," I smile, pulling her closer. I may
regret this in the morning, but at the moment I don't care. It's her Coming
Out. She can choose whomever she wants. It would be inconsiderate to say
no. I lean forward to kiss her again, and see that Obi-Wan is collecting a
drink at the bar not far away, watching us with a strange expression on his
face.

Siri glances down at the barrier packets around her neck. "Want to help me
get rid of one of these?"

"Just one?"

Obi-Wan, drink in hand, is moving towards us. He doesn't look happy. I
glance pointedly over Siri's shoulder, and she turns to face him just as he
arrives. He smiles coolly at her. Siri leans back against me, pulling one
of my hands around to rest on her bare abdomen, just below her navel. My
fingertips graze the edge of the silver fabric. Obi-Wan raises an eyebrow at
her, jaw tensing just slightly.

"Hello, Siri. Still trying to get rid of those barriers, are you?"

"I'm going to beat your record," she grins, pulling my other hand up and --
oh, Force -- sucking one of my fingers into her mouth. I'm suddenly hard,
and I can't help pressing my erection into her ass. She presses her body
back. I have to close my eyes.

I can feel the irritation rolling off of my apprentice. I open my eyes, and
see that he is only barely concealing it.

And for some reason, I don't care. He has been quite difficult lately, ever
since we returned from that extended mission to Ferri Prime. He hasn't let
me touch him since we got back. We haven't had sex in weeks. He's been
sulky, irritable, and occasionally rude to me tonight. I'm tired of his
behavior. I want him to be jealous, if that is indeed what he's feeling.
I lean forward and trace my tongue along the shell of Siri's ear, slowly, my
eyes locked on Obi-Wan's.

His cool gaze slowly becomes a mild glare. "Siri, I'd like to have a word
with my master, if you don't mind."

She tenses against me, realizing that he's actually angry. I'm beyond
irritated at Obi-Wan, but this may be a good opportunity to straighten out
the apparent rift between us. "Go on," I whisper. "Perhaps later." She
slips away, leaving me to face my surly apprentice. I shift uncomfortably on
the stool, but I don't bother to hide my arousal.

Obi-Wan's gaze follows Siri as she rejoins a group on the dance floor. When
he turns back to me, his eyes immediately focus on my crotch. "So, Master,
are you planning to seduce all my friends tonight, or just the ones you
know would irritate me the most?"

That can't be what's really bothering him. It can't be that simple. "What
are you talking about?"

He gives me a long look. "Please, Qui-Gon. You prefer anonymous sex. You
seek it out here, in places like this. I've never known you to fuck someone
you actually know in a club."

I raise an eyebrow at that. "Never?" He gives me an odd look, then takes a
sip of his drink. He doesn't remember. I thought he wouldn't. He was
fairly drunk. So was I.

"Well... never, as far as I know. Look, I only asked you to come because
you've seemed kind of tense lately, and I thought it would do you some good."

I choke out a startled laugh. "I've been tense? You must be joking.
You're the one who's been sulking for a week now!"

"I have not been sulking."

"No? You've barely spoken a sentence to me in days. You won't let me
anywhere near you. You duck out early, alone, and return after I've gone to
bed. I almost didn't come tonight because I couldn't imagine you'd want me
here. Ever since we've gotten back from Ferri Prime--"

"Oh, no, no -- do *not* bring up Ferri Prime now. That's not fair."

I steel my jaw, biting back the retort that so quickly comes to mind. I pick
up my drink and take a sip, forcing myself to wait out my anger. He had been
extremely frustrated that our mission was unexpectedly extended, and he took
that frustration out on me. He wouldn't tell me what was wrong, and I still
am not sure precisely what the problem was. It was true that we didn't
really need to stay for the ceremonies, and I should have consulted him
before agreeing with the Council's suggestion that we remain there for
another week. We had a very intense argument when he found out, and he
stormed out of our shared room, disappearing for the rest of the night. He
apologized for his behavior the next morning, but he hasn't slept with me
since -- literally. He's kissed me a few times, but only in that teasing
manner he affects when he wants something from me.

Maybe I've been sulking a little as well. I'm being punished for something,
but I have no idea what I did to deserve this treatment. Perhaps I've been
pouting into my drink, hoping to catch his eye. The only positive attention
I've gotten tonight has been from his concerned friends, and when I've
responded to their attention, he's gotten jealous. Have I been *trying* to
make him jealous? I need to put a stop to this.

I sigh and reach for his hand, enfolding it in my own. "Obi-Wan, we can't
continue like this. I'm sorry for whatever I did to make you withdraw from
me, and I'm sorry my behavior tonight is irritating you. Perhaps my coming
here was a bad idea. I should leave."

He jerks his hand away, scowling. "You won't get to play the martyr that
easily. Forget Ferri Prime. I've already told you that I was... it was
nothing. It doesn't matter anymore, at least." He takes a sip of his drink
and scans the dance floor. "Go find someone to fuck, all right?" He turns
to look at me, his expression controlled. "Then come home to me."

Something snaps in me at that, and I slam my glass onto the bar. "So I'm to
jump at your command, is that it? I only get to fuck you when you decide
I've behaved well enough, and I deserve to be rewarded? Did it ever occur to
you that perhaps I want something else? That perhaps you've rejected me a
little too frequently lately, and I've had enough?" I stare hard at him,
realizing that I'm shaking. Because every word is true.

His eyes widen and he takes a step back. For a moment I think he's actually
going to show some emotion, but he steels himself. "Fine," he says, voice
small and sharp. He opens his mouth to say something more, and then closes
it again. We stare at each other for a long moment, the silence hanging
heavy between us, even immersed as we are in the noise of the club.

The tension is physically broken by a lithe body darting between us to hop up
on the bar. Startled, I turn towards the boy with stylishly spiky blond hair
and a padawan braid that's been tinged blue. He grins at us both. "Buy me a
drink?"

"Keli," Obi-Wan begins, "This isn't a good time."

Keli pouts just a little before turning to me hopefully. I've only met him
once before, and that was in the Temple, where he looked like any other
padawan. He looks much younger here, almost waiflike and innocent.
Coincidentally, today is his seventeenth birthday, and he's wearing the shirt
that Obi gave him as a gift -- tight pink shimmersilk, with the word
"JAILBAIT" printed in silver across his chest. I shudder to think what his
Coming Out will be like in a year.

As much as I'd like to buy him a drink, it would only infuriate Obi-Wan
further at this point. Keli looks back at Obi-Wan and seems to realize that
he's interrupted something. He hops down off of the bar and smiles
apologetically, preparing to leave us to our argument. He reaches out and
strokes Obi-Wan's arm. "You promised to dance with me tonight, remember? I
plan to hold you to that."

Obi-Wan smiles. "How about now?" He turns to me. "Unless you want a go at
him?"

I can only glare in response. How dare he suggest that I...?

He turns and walks away, pulling an embarrassed Keli with him.

Fuck.

FIN

Previous episode || Next episode

Back to the QAJ archive

Back to Emma's page

Back to the Siri Tachi Archive