~*~
“Ladies and Gentleman! Boys and Girls! Gryffindors of all ages!”
Harry looked up from the essay he’d been wringing from his quill for Potions. Fred and George Weasley were standing on a table at the far end of the Gryffindor common room, striking dramatic poses that commanded the attention of the entire room. Even Hermione had glanced up over her barricade of books to see what the fuss was all about.
“The Weasley Brothers-“ Fred announced.
“-Incorporated-“ interjected George.
“-would like to present their latest and most anticipated product for St. Valentine’s hallowed holiday of love!”
“Please, please, hold on to your pocket books,” Fred said, waving his hands as George fetched something out of a satchel lying on the table. “For a limited time only, the Weasley Brothers-“
“-Incorporated-“
“-give you…” The twins exchanged glances and paused for dramatic effect. At this point, they’d gathered everyone’s rapt attention – Harry thought he even saw Colin Creevy hold his breath as the Weasley twins paused.
George pulled a small, heart-shaped box from behind his back, holding it tilted up for everyone to see. There was something written on the cover, but from where Harry sat, he couldn’t make out what it said.
“…The Keys to Desire!” Fred burst with much aplomb, holding his arms out to display the box in all its apparent glory. The crowd of Gryffindors that had gathered around the table began to titter with excitement. Then, someone called out, “Whadda they do?”
George raised his eyebrow. It was apparent he’d been waiting for someone to ask that question.
“Allow us to demonstrate,” he said with a mischievous glance toward his twin. Fred nodded and turned toward the crowd.
“Oh, RONALD!” he shouted, cupping his hands around his mouth. A tuft of red hair visible over the top of one of the over-stuffed armchairs near the fire disappeared. There was a simmer of laughter in the crowd as George called, “Oh, come on, brother-dear – you owe us, remember?”
Nothing stirred in the armchair, but Harry could imagine Ron was sinking even lower in his seat. Seamus Finnegan, who was standing toward the back of the crowd, got a manic sort of smile searing across his face as he bounded across the room and round the chair. A moment later, he was dragging a tomato-red Ron by the wrist, leading him triumphantly to the table that now doubled as a stage. Using a chair as a step up, he shoved Ron onto the tabletop, where Fred and George stood wearing matching leering grins. They allowed Ron to stand in between them, hunched over and scowling at each person on the floor individually.
George carefully opened the box and displayed the contents. There were three pink key-shaped hard-candies lying side by side on the raised interior of the box, and each was shaped like a key. George swiveled, turning towards Fred, who reached around Ron and plucked the middle key out. He held it up with one hand as he reached out with the other and gripped Ron’s chin, forcibly prying open his mouth.
“Watch him carefully,” George stage-whispered, almost conspiratorially, to his audience. “As he sucks on the candy, his true desire, locked deep inside him, will occupy the forefront of his mind, and everything will be suddenly clear to him…”
Fred dropped the key into Ron’s mouth, and as soon as he loosened his grip on his brother’s chin, Ron looked away, his cheeks burning redder than his hair as he dejectedly sucked on his candy.
The crowd of Gryffindors began to slap their hands on their knees in an improvised drum-roll as Ron scowled and stared at the tabletop. After a few moments, the drumming died off and people started murmuring, as Ron remained a hunched figure on the table, pouting and narrowing his eyes at his brothers.
“It’s not working…” whispered a third year standing near the table Harry sat at. Her friend shrugged and answered, “Maybe he just doesn’t have any hidden desires.”
They both snickered, and at the same moment, onstage, Ron suddenly went rigid. His eyes went wide and he froze in place, catching the attention of Fred and George’s fickle audience. Then, his head snapped up, and his eyes locked with a wide-eyed, dumbfounded expression on something behind Harry. He turned around, as did everyone else, and there seemed a cumulative realization that Ron’s eyes were fixed on another pair of eyes, peeking out over a stack of books and framed on top by a nest of bushy brown hair.
Hoots and wolf-whistles echoed off the ceiling of the common room and Fred and George grinned triumphantly as they dragged a transfixed Ron off the stage. They took only a moment to toss him in Harry’s general direction before returning to their adoring public, who were now pulling out their galleons to get their very own box.
“Step right up! We only have a very limited amount!” Fred called, running back to the satchel on the table before anyone made off with their treasures.
“Buy one for yourself, or that special someone!” George added, already taking people’s money even though he didn’t have the product on hand. “Make him realize you’re all he desires!”
Harry raised his eyebrow at the hub-bub, then turned his eyes onto Ron, who had been thrown into the chair across from him. The boy’s blush had faded, and so had his scowl, replaced by an expression that resembled that of a lobotomy patient. Harry followed his gaze to Hermione’s lone table, where the girl was hastily gathering up her books and vehemently ignoring Lavender Brown, who was giggling and asking very loudly, “Did you know Ron likes you? Do you like him back? Oh Merlin, you totally like him back!”
Hermione’s face was trying to decide whether to turn red from embarrassment, or purple with anger, as she tucked her stack of books beneath her chin and shuffled out of the common room.
Harry looked back at Ron.
“Ron.”
There was no response.
“Hey, Ron!” Harry waved his hand in front of Ron’s face, but the boy remained unresponsive. All of a sudden, with an intake of breath that reassured Harry that his friend was still alive, Ron stood up and said, “I think I’ll go to the library.”
With that, he strode with stiff purpose towards the portrait hole.
Harry watched him go, mildly bewildered with his head cocked to the side. A hand on his shoulder snapped him back to reality, and he turned to see Fred Weasley with his back to him, smiling and calling out to the crowd of girls vying for his product, “Sorry, girls, they’re all gone! We’ll have some more made next week! Make your down payment over there with George!”
Behind his back, Fred was holding a half-crushed box of the product in question, a collapsed crease running through the words “Keys to Desire” written on the cover. Fred turned his head for a moment and winked at Harry, whose lips quirked into a quick and thankful smile as he took the box, hiding it in his robe pocket.
“Had to save one for our very best customer,” Fred muttered, giving Harry a smirk then crossing the room to join George. Harry looked down at his pocket, and wondered what on earth the Weasley twins thought he was going to do with three Keys to Desire.
~*~
The next morning, Ron and Hermione didn’t seem to be on speaking terms. However, this time they didn’t seem to be angry with each other. When Hermione came and sat down at the Gryffindor table across from Harry, she blushed and made a point to not look to Harry’s left, where Ron was sitting. It was amusing to watch, Harry thought, because each one would look up at the other every so often, and without fail, every time their eyes met, each would blush furiously and look guiltily at their plates. It kind of made Harry wonder what had happened after Ron had left for the library the previous night.
After half of the meal was conducted in this manner, Harry finally decided he’d had enough amusement for the morning and broke the silence among the three of them.
“So,” he said conversationally, as if the first ten minutes of their meal had simply been a lull in conversation, “Fred and George gave me a box of those Key candies.”
Hermione looked up at him, focusing her gaze on his right ear just to be safe. She wrinkled her nose as she said, “Oh, please don’t tell me you paid money for those silly things.”
Harry shook his head and took a large, hearty bite of marmalade-soaked toast. “Nope, they just gave one to me. I think it’s because I bought some of those faulty singing tops from them last month.”
Ron grimaced. “You mean the ones that sing ‘God save the Queen’ backwards?”
Harry shrugged and said, “They tried so hard to sell them to me. I felt bad.”
Hermione’s mouth pinched and made the familiar twist to the right side of her mouth. “So what are you going to do with those candies? I hope you’re not thinking of feeding them to some poor defenseless Ravenclaw seeker.”
Hermione’s eyes shot accusations like daggers. Harry lifted his shoulders and rolled his eyes, “I would never do that, come on, Hermione.”
He snuck a glance over to the Ravenclaw table. “Although… it would be interesting…”
“No, it wouldn’t, bring those wandering eyes back to reality, Harry!” Hermione directed in a shrill voice, pointing her finger to the table. Harry laughed, turning back and directing his attention to his toast crusts. He picked one up and dipped it in the marmalade, licking his fingers after he’d finished them off.
“You know, maybe I’ll have one myself,” he said suddenly, interrupting the silence that had temporarily descended over the table. “It might be nice to know for certain exactly what I want.”
“No, it’s not,” Ron grumbled, but promptly shut his mouth when Hermione shot a warning glare at him, then looked away quickly with a furious blush and her lips pressed into a frustrated line.
Harry snickered, and then pulled the box out of his pocket, where it had spent the night. He opened it up and contemplated the three keys inside. Each one was a vibrant shade of pink – smooth and clear and made entirely of crystallize sugar. Each key was of a different design as well, with assorted embellishments accenting the basic skeletal shape. Harry plucked the left one out of the box, the one with a swirling decorated handle.
“Harry, don’t do that,” Hermione sighed in an exasperated motherly tone.
Ron sat up straight for the first time that morning and looked at Harry with wide eyes. “Seriously, mate, you’ll only embarrass yourself.”
Harry smiled and shrugged, popping the candy into his mouth.
~*~
Story Notes:
Originally posted: April 4, 2006
Lead Author: KKR (
a_real_phony, formerly princesskariboo)
End Authors: knightmare (knightmare3099), dreamyraynbo(dreamyraynbo), and Emma Grant (emmagrant01)
Artists: ravyn_ashling (ravyn_ashling)
Main character: Harry Potter
Era: Fifth Year
Art by
ravyn_ashlingAuthor's Chapter Notes:
Originally posted here .
Chapter End Notes:
See the endings written by Knightmare, Dreamraynbow, and me (Emma Grant).